How to prioritize what matters most in your life rather than attempting to achieve everything.
With the start of a new year comes an enormous amount of pressure to establish a variety of ambitious goals. Unfortunately, prioritizing quantity over quality is a sure way to burn yourself out. In a recent Insightful Leader podcast interview, Harry Kraemer, a former CEO turned management professor at Kellogg, stated that most individuals struggle with balancing things because they haven't been self-reflective enough to find out what they're attempting to balance. We examine how self-reflection may help you connect your behaviors with your values in this blog post.
We think about how to live our best lives at the beginning of each new year, adding new hobbies and habits to our calendars - yet, according to Kraemer, many people struggle to keep things sustainable. So we resort to "I'll simply go faster and faster." And what happens is that we confuse activity with productivity. Instead of doing more and more and exhausting ourselves with things that don't matter as much to us, Kraemer will help us strike a balance between what matters most to us and what doesn't.
DETERMINE WHAT YOUR VALUES ARE:
Kraemer claims that most individuals have difficulty balancing things because they haven't been self-reflective enough to find out what they're trying to balance. So, how do you determine what your values are? You'll have to decide what's worth your time. And you do this by taking some time to think about yourself. Take a few minutes, turn off all of your devices, and find a nice peaceful place to ask yourself these questions:
What are my values?
What is my goal?
What is truly important to me?
What type of leader do I aspire to be?
What type of role model do I want to set for others?
2. Divide your values into Six BUCKETS
According to Kraemer, you can typically split things you care about into six buckets: your profession or education, your family and the people you care about, your spiritual or religious beliefs, your health, another bucket is having fun, and the last bucket is social duty or volunteering.
For example, you could wish to make some major structural changes at work for the individuals you oversee. Simultaneously, you want to spend more time with your family, which is a shared value. Perhaps you'd want to spend more time practicing mindfulness, sleeping, and exercising, as well as going on exciting trips with friends and volunteering at your local bank. These are all fantastic. And you've done some great introspection.
So, what's next? How can you make this list of values a reality? It's time to think about how you spend each of the 168 hours in a week. Kraemer recommends making a grid using a pen and paper for this. You'll want to write down the buckets we discussed in the rows (career, family, spirituality, health, fun and social responsibility).
3. Next, you'll make three columns
The first column represents your overall goal. Where would you like to spend the most of your time? And this would be "on average," because if you're traveling all week and aren't around it'll skew the numbers. So, where would you spend your time on average?
The second column represents current reality. You now need to be honest with yourself, according to Kraemer. Take out your calendar. And consider how you spent your time on average over the previous few months.
The difference would be assigned to the third column. This is where you'll find out how many hours you're falling short of your goals. And it's normal to feel unbalanced. But what if you're extremely close or just happen to have the proper numbers? Don't count on it, according to Kraemer. Kraemer is skeptical that total life balance is achievable. We pursue it. And if you're close, fantastic, but there's always room for improvement.
4. Consult with someone you trust and respect about this chart
Look for a variety of reactions. Is this a good thing? They may respond, “Thanks for sharing, but I watch your acts every day, and based on your behaviors...you know what? Your values are clearly right on point." Or is it no so good news? Which could sound something like this, "Wow, based on your actions, I’m amazed you’re confused enough to think those are your values.” Whichever way the responses sway, your capacity to be open enough to elicit responses is a step in the right direction.
5. Once you've created a solid grid, it's time to adjust your life
You've put down your goals, the hours you'd want to spend on them, and the difference - now it's time to adapt your life to come closer to your target schedule. But, according to Kraemer, things become sticky here because many of us find comfort in doing things a specific way - but we don't necessarily analyze whether that's the best approach. So literally, look at your work and figure out how much of something you could cut out.
Also, consider reevaluating what is fixed in your life. With a little bit of planning, a lot of it might not be. Everyone has different levels of flexibility and inflexibility in their life. For example, if you're caring for an elderly parent, it's something you can't put off in favor of working at a shelter that you truly care about. Make every effort to adjust what you can without disrupting what you can't.
6. It takes practice to live a life that reflects your values
Although you probably won't achieve success immediately, strive to develop the practice of regularly evaluating your progress. Kraemer claims that he spends 15 minutes at the end of each day asking himself a series of questions. If you will, consider this a personal self-examination.
What did I promise to accomplish today?
What exactly did I do?
What am I most proud of?
What am I least proud of?
How did I lead others?
How can I keep track of people?
What would I do differently if I could relive today?
Finally, if I have tomorrow—knowing full well that I will not, sooner or later—and I am a learner, how will I function differently tomorrow based on what I learned today?
This actually puts everything into perspective. Living a purposeful, values-based life involves a great deal of introspection and hard work on the back end. However, when you strategize, you change what you can and leave what you can't. And evaluate yourself on a regular basis. You'll be in a better position to make this - and future - years count.